This kid just doesn't stop.

During class, the kid offers a rhyming word:


"Crack. You know, like butt crack?"

He said this during class, randomly. Well, it seemed random to me.

"...at least we get to walk around in our underwears and pee standing up."

typical morning conversation

Two teachers are fussing around with the coffee.

F: I'm going to buy coffee beans tonight.

A: We also need coffee filters * gives him the empty box*.

F: Okay. #2 coffee filters, and beans. #2 coffee filters and beans.

A: Put that in your pipe and smoke it.

F: I need to inject it. Smoking won't cut it. I need the pure adrenaline rush of unbleached coffee fliters.

From a couple weeks ago...I've been busy. This kid has not.

Teacher: There are 4 weeks left of school.

Student: *looks up, groggily* 4 weeks left of school? I gotta start doing my homework.

This time of year? He's right.

Boy: Did you forget to take your medication or something?

Girl: I don't take medication.


Boy: Well, you need to.





thanks to Dana!

Seems simple to me.

Student: Miss, you're strange.

Teacher: Weren't you taught not to talk to strangers?

Student: *becomes lost in apparent thought*

Like all things Spanish, it is dangerous.

Stumbled across this on the web. Enjoy.

gutterminded!

***Class is discussing Romeo and Juliet...So Romeo has a crush on a girl, and this girl tells him that she will remain chaste forever....with me?***

Teacher: What does Shakespeare mean by telling his audience that Roseline has decided, “stay the siege of loving terms?"

Multiple students: She’s a lesbian!

Teacher: Umm… NO!!!



Thanks to Seth. Where are you teaching, Seth?

I think it's the appropriate response.

Kid: Miss, what would you do if I cut off your hair?

Teacher 1: *thinks for one second* Call the police?

Teacher 2: *collapses in laughter*

Yep. Teaching is just like that.

Teacher is soliciting different job titles from the students, for use in a characterization exercise.

The students shout out:

"Doctor!"

"Engineer!"

"Computer guy!"

"BAYWATCH! ....I mean teacher."


From, you guessed it, Billings Steve.

Send this one to Cute Overload! *singsong*

**First grade students are working on the computers**

Teacher: No, dear, you need to be on Brainpop junior (brainpopjr.com). You are on Brainpop.

Student: *thinks for a second* Do you think Brainpop is Brainpopjr's father?


All at Caught in Class swoon over the cuteness! I particularly like this, because all of my students either say things about torching the school, or tell me to f*&# 0ff. First graders are so nice.

Thanks, Jewelsrule!

Anywhere else, and I'd be fired for saying this.

Kid: Miss? Can I open a window?

Teacher: No, it's too cold out.

Kid: Pleeeeeeze? It's roasting in here!

Teacher: Okay, you can crack the window open.

Kid: *opens window carefully--it falls wide open*

Teacher: That is not a crack. That is a gaping maw.

If only every day could be...

*teacher is talking like a rasta man*

Teacher: Today is da grading day, mon.

Student: What's "dagrading day?"

Teacher: It's where you turn to your neighbor and tell him he's stupid!

All students: *crack up and start insulting each other*


Thanks, Billings Steve

Into the mind of an 8th grade boy

Teacher: And so a quilt is made of...

Boy: ....leather.

No proof needed...I'm right there with you.

School treasurer: Damn it! I left my lunch AND breakfast on the counter at home!

Teacher friend: Nuts. I hate that! Well, at least you can eat school lunch, and breakfast.

School treasurer: I can't do that! I'd have cancer by 4 o'clock!

We're back from break.

Worse for wear, here in Denver, but we're back.

Send in your overheard conversations, folks. We need a laugh!

Winter Break

We are officially on winter break. I doubt many teachers out there will be motivated to send me their funny conversations, as they are all at home, sleeping.

We'll get back to you after school is in session.

SNOW DAY!

SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!
SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!
SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!
SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!
SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!
SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!
SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!
SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!
SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!
SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!SNOWDAY!


You think kids get excited about a day off? They've got nothing on the excitement that teachers feel.